more teenage angst

i remind you every single day of how much i love you, but you’ll never understand. you saved my life. no, you didn’t pull me from a burning building or do any of those unrealistic super hero things, but you saved me in a different way. i was self destructing. in previous years i had been cutting myself. i was sad and i felt alone all the time. after a few months of therapy i had stopped the self injuring, which was progress. but then i started getting more and more involved in partying. i was going a little crazy. i was doing anything i could get my hands on, and you worried for me. i honestly didn’t care what happened to me. i didn’t care if i got kicked out of school, kicked out of my house, i didn’t really even give a fuck if i lived or died. but then you showed me what it was like to be really happy. you showed me what it was like to truly love someone and want to be around to spend time with them. you helped me learn to not only love someone else but to love myself. i don’t know how you did it, but you turned my entire life around. you told me you’d always be there for me to back me up and help me when i feel tempted, and you’ve stayed true to your word. i can’t say that about any other person in my life. you’re my hero. without you in my life who knows where i’d be right now, or even a few months from now. so no, you didn’t take a bullet or do any of that crazy shit to save me. you saved me in a more important way, you made me realize i am actually worth something. i love you jason.